Tag Archives: cucumber

Once You’re a Pickle, You Can Never Go Back To Being a Cucumber


I mean come on...does it have to say white?

I mean come on…does it have to say white?

I heard the other day that men think about sex every 11 minutes.  It occurred to me last night at the rock climbing gym, as I  reached into my chalk bag and saw cocaine, that I think about drugs and alcohol just about as frequently.  It’s not that I’m triggered every 600+ seconds, but I smell, and taste, and see coke and booze everywhere:

1. When I reach into my chalk bag

2. When I eat hotwings

3. When I see football

4. When it’s 5:00

5. When it’s any-o’clock

6. When I see Metro-North

7. When I smell coca cola I smell rum

8.  When I smell red bull I taste jager

9. When I hear country music I want whiskey

10. When hear the word “ski” I think of coke benders

11. When I hear the word “happy” I think hour

12. When I hear MacDre

13. When I eat celery I think bloody mary

14. When it snows I think Baileys

15. When I smell BBQ I think keg

16. When I hear cucumber I think about how I’m a pickle

The list goes on, and on, and on…….and on…..

RIP cucumbers

RIP cucumbers

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